Devotional: Psalms 42

To the chief Musician, Maschil, for the sons of Korah. As the hart panteth after the water brooks, so panteth my soul after thee, O God. My soul thirsteth for God, for the living God: when shall I come and appear before God? My tears have been my meat day and night, while they continually say unto me, Where is thy God? When I remember these things, I pour out my soul in me: for I had gone with the multitude, I went with them to the house of God, with the voice of joy and praise, with a multitude that kept holyday. Why art thou cast down, O my soul? and why art thou disquieted in me? hope thou in God: for I shall yet praise him for the help of his countenance. PSALMS 42:1-5

Many of you may be familiar with the old chorus that is written based on the first few verses of this Psalm. "As the deer panteth for the waters, so my soul longeth after thee. You, Oh Lord, are my heart's desire and I long to worship thee...." I always loved the sweet, soft peace in the atmosphere of that song, but this song is not as soothing sounding. The words of these first five verses are a cry of a heart in desperation.

This Psalm has been a favorite of mine through many a difficult time period in my life. Times when my world seemed to be crashing down all around me, and depression grabbed me, gripping me by the throat so that my very life felt like it was fading. The enemy comes in like a flood sometimes, he tries to convince us our hope is gone. Even our friends may ask us as Job's friends did, what is our secret sin? When we stand in faith, believing that the trials are temporary, they will ask, "Where is your God?" Our hearts and minds may know to trust in God, but it may become very difficult when faced with pain, disease, or lack; particularly if you have to watch a child or a loved one suffer. Sometimes there are no answers for those who question our trust in God. All we can do is persevere. Our hope is in God.

I have had conversations with Father God much like the words in this Psalm describe. I've done everything, I am praising you in the midst of the fiery furnace, yet the enemy mocks YOU! And he mocks my faith in You. Yet again God's grace reminds me of Job and his words. "I know my Redeemer lives!" "Though He slay me, yet I will trust in Him." It is good to remind myself that whatever I am going through, Jesus understands. He suffered and experienced everything we ever could, and He promises to never leave us nor forsake us. There is suffering in this world. We cannot know God's heart if we don't experience suffering. Sin and it's consequences doesn't make God as angry as it does cause Him to suffer and grieve. His Holiness and Righteousness produce the wrath but His Love shields us in Mercy.

So this Psalm intermingles grief and despair with hope and faith. We can speak to our own souls and tell them to hope in God, because all tears will be forgotten in the light of His Countenance. We can answer those who question, where is your God? He is right here with me. He is pouring His strength into me, because I have no more of my own. He is giving me joy and hope, when there is no tangible reason for these to exist in me. I will seek my God, not because He has an answer to stop my suffering, but because He is everything to me. If He would forsake me, I could not breathe another breath. He holds me in the palm of His Hand. By Him the stars are held in their places. He brings the sunshine and the rain, when the earth is parched. He floods me being with the warmth and light of His Love and His Presence. I desperately need Him, He is all I need.